Dear Villain from a Bollywood Movie in the Registry today (think the movie Ek Villain),

It’s a whole thing with you today.

Your haircut confuses me. It is a very 1980’s near mullet, but here we are firmly ensconced in the 21st century.

Your super shiny rectangular belt buckle is distracting me. It catches the fluorescent lights in here and it’s consistently drawing my gaze to your crotch region. Please do not be alarmed, nor should you feel self satisfied. I am just easily distracted by shiny things.

So many things with you today.

You keep reaching for something. Hitching up your belt, fixing your shirt. So very shifty. I don’t know if you are going to pull a knife or a credit card to pay a filing fee.

I feel like at any moment the theme from Kill Bill will begin and shit’s going down. No, I’ve changed my mind. There is something about that hair, those shoes and that midnight black suit with the silver tie that screams Vincent Vega to me. Either way, I am convinced that you have blades in the points of your boots.

Now that your business here is concluded, and the hypnotic glint of your belt out of sight, I can get back to work.

And assuming that shit’s not about to get real up in this place, I’ll see you tomorrow.

Sincerely,

The chick behind the ballistic glass

(who may or may not be staring at your crotch)