I’m the other guy.

I have been experiencing a lot of different emotions when it comes to my writing lately.  The Caycie Thompson side of things has been chugging along.  It has had its challenges, but it has also brought me some real satisfaction.

She has let me experience some of the excitement that comes along with publishing your work and seeing actual tangible evidence of your work in the world.

Publishing has also allowed me to step outside of my writing shell and encouraged me to embrace the marketing side of the business.  That is a whole other story.  One, I will delve into at some point, just not today.

This post, however, is in response to my most recent rejections.  I took them pretty hard this time around.  It could have a lot to do with the fact that they seemed to come in one right after the other.  I am usually upbeat about them and look at my rejections as proof that I am trying, and that I am continuing to put myself out there.  But there was just something about these last couple that kind of took the wind right out of my sails.

The thing that really struck me was the empty Submittable chart staring back at me.  So, not only did I just get kicked to the proverbial curb by all of the lit mags I had submitted to but I also hadn’t been quite as on top of submitting as I thought I had in the first place.

It was just this bit of a double-whammy and ego check that happened, and honestly, I haven’t bounced back yet.  I haven’t submitted anything new via Submittable in the past couple of months and that naked chart was a bit startling and it was a huge nudge to get back to work.

With my attention split the way that it is, Caycie Thompson on one hand, and Abigail Grimes on the other, I find myself falling victim to a bit of tunnel vision.  I tend to forget or not credit the work I am doing on one side of the equation when I am looking at the other.  It is not at all helpful, and it is more than a little bit anxiety-inducing.

I have goals that I would like to achieve under both monickers and truly need to give myself some space to appreciate the work that has gone into getting both of these projects as far as they have, but I also need to balance that appreciation with continued drive and guard against becoming complacent.

I have submitted a couple of items to local contests and am waiting to hear back from them.  I will be sure to keep you posted as the responses come in.

In the meantime, even though I am ‘the other guy’, I can say I put myself out there.  And I will continue to do so, a little battered and bruised, but I will get back in that ring and battle it out again and again.  Because at the end of the day, I love it, and it is worth fighting for – even if the person I’m fighting is me.